I do understand why i have uploaded one of my past watercolour works here, but i am not yet wanting to be entirely open about ALL that is bearing down on me at present except perhaps to state one..
My blog here as donna con il violino blu, as well as the many other blogs i have are journals, and they are a record to stand that i once existed, as there is no one to come after me.
I feel compelled to leave part of me behind in this way.
I have done this over the last three years through painting, photography, through my poetry, through writing.. in any way i can and in the only way i know how to do and i do this with my heart, soul and entire being.
Now MUSICALLY here through the violin and all the inspiration that comes from my experiences with it, i go about hoping i can record it ALL for it is important to me that i do this.
Now MUSICALLY here through the violin and all the inspiration that comes from my experiences with it, i go about hoping i can record it ALL for it is important to me that i do this.
do you really see me
I struggle from many spheres and try to comprehend what is happening within my world which has bought about much frustration, sadness and emotional pain and is affecting my very essence and therefore impacting on my journey here through the beautiful music of the violin.
It's also important that i record all the support offered in its many forms, be it from those who know me well, or don't know me except for what they see as they just pass by here.. those that are here long term on the journey or here for only a short time to share.
Therefore my watercolour work featured above titled do you really see me asks a question of the viewer.
One such viewer on visiting my blog a few days ago offered their kind thoughts which went some way as to providing me with some light on what was a very dark weekend for me.
I am doing my best to keep focused.. on track.. to look further down the road with playing my violin but i am having great trouble am feeling fragile and have not yet picked up my heart.
This person is not known to me, however they took some time to read through my blog and respond.
They offered sincerity not cynicism, warmth not coldness, they opted to communicate and not have me feel isolation, they did so willingly without expecting anything in return and without knowing my circumstance except for what they have read, seen & sensed here.
Although i provided the link to this site, i simply said they would be welcome to visit, not knowing that they had .. i did not ask for a response however a response i received and one which was timely for the way i am feeling in this moment and no doubt will feel for a while to come.
They gave of their time and in doing so they gave of themselves.
I post it below so it too is threaded and woven into this journey.
I will no doubt read the words over and over and have it remind me that when one door seems closed another opens out to let in light and air.
Philcmiller, as i only know you by this name
i thank you
dal cuore
________________
Though you never mention the specifics of your current emotional struggles, your omission of the specifics is part of the excellence of the blog.
Anyone of any significant age and experience knows what it means to have their heart and soul ground to powder and blown to the wind.
One need not rationalize the specifics. That part of the story can be fully grasped only through the life-experience of the individual. All your friends need to know is that though your former heart may have perished, the physical body did not, so some new heart must grow within the hollow shell. A new you with new dreams is being born.
Your blog graphically shows us the foundation upon which you are rebuilding; your art, your dreams of mastering the violin, and your poetic writings.
Perugina, I wish you the very very best in this effort. I am 53 years old and have survived two tragedies that few would be able to identify with. Not only did I survive, but each new heart was richer and more beautiful than the last. Of course, regenerated beauty cannot be comprehended by all, only by those to whom the gift is given.
Lastly, your blog does not give us any clues as to the day to day substance of your existence. What it shows us is your own concept of yourself, your sense of self-worth, and your vision of the beauty you have to offer the world if it will only stop and look.
You paint yourself as several beautiful women that you know live within you, you photograph yourself as the lover and protector of your instrument, adoring it as you guard it, just as a mother with her child or a God with his creation.
You reveal your sensuality through the flow of lines rather than through the less-dignified over-exposure of your body (as several on RedBubble are prone to do).
As I put down a last word, I want the budding new heart within you to know that one more person in the world was completely captivated by that portion of you that radiates beauty, dignity and a haunting grace.
As you live your life through your common days as a regular woman enduring the inevitable realities of being a struggling human being, please know that the Perugina you know lives within you is a powerful and captivating woman.
You have chosen to reveal this magnificent woman to any who will stop, look, read, and think.
Those who have taken the time to do so will not be able to soon forget you.
Grow and develop, Perugina…you are a beautiful child becoming a beautiful woman.
Hold your violin when you cry.
_________________
philcmiller
21 May, 2010
They offered sincerity not cynicism, warmth not coldness, they opted to communicate and not have me feel isolation, they did so willingly without expecting anything in return and without knowing my circumstance except for what they have read, seen & sensed here.
Although i provided the link to this site, i simply said they would be welcome to visit, not knowing that they had .. i did not ask for a response however a response i received and one which was timely for the way i am feeling in this moment and no doubt will feel for a while to come.
They gave of their time and in doing so they gave of themselves.
I post it below so it too is threaded and woven into this journey.
I will no doubt read the words over and over and have it remind me that when one door seems closed another opens out to let in light and air.
Philcmiller, as i only know you by this name
i thank you
dal cuore
________________
donna con il violino blu
________________________________________
When you sent me an invitation to your blog I went to it and studied your words, paintings, photographs, and the quality of the blog itself. Perugina, your blog reveals the heart of a truly classy individual. Though you never mention the specifics of your current emotional struggles, your omission of the specifics is part of the excellence of the blog.
Anyone of any significant age and experience knows what it means to have their heart and soul ground to powder and blown to the wind.
One need not rationalize the specifics. That part of the story can be fully grasped only through the life-experience of the individual. All your friends need to know is that though your former heart may have perished, the physical body did not, so some new heart must grow within the hollow shell. A new you with new dreams is being born.
Your blog graphically shows us the foundation upon which you are rebuilding; your art, your dreams of mastering the violin, and your poetic writings.
Perugina, I wish you the very very best in this effort. I am 53 years old and have survived two tragedies that few would be able to identify with. Not only did I survive, but each new heart was richer and more beautiful than the last. Of course, regenerated beauty cannot be comprehended by all, only by those to whom the gift is given.
Lastly, your blog does not give us any clues as to the day to day substance of your existence. What it shows us is your own concept of yourself, your sense of self-worth, and your vision of the beauty you have to offer the world if it will only stop and look.
You paint yourself as several beautiful women that you know live within you, you photograph yourself as the lover and protector of your instrument, adoring it as you guard it, just as a mother with her child or a God with his creation.
You reveal your sensuality through the flow of lines rather than through the less-dignified over-exposure of your body (as several on RedBubble are prone to do).
As I put down a last word, I want the budding new heart within you to know that one more person in the world was completely captivated by that portion of you that radiates beauty, dignity and a haunting grace.
As you live your life through your common days as a regular woman enduring the inevitable realities of being a struggling human being, please know that the Perugina you know lives within you is a powerful and captivating woman.
You have chosen to reveal this magnificent woman to any who will stop, look, read, and think.
Those who have taken the time to do so will not be able to soon forget you.
Grow and develop, Perugina…you are a beautiful child becoming a beautiful woman.
Hold your violin when you cry.
_________________
philcmiller
21 May, 2010
donna con il violino blu © 2010 patricia vannucci
original artwork
'do you really see me'
perugina art © 2009 patricia vannucci
5 comments:
Beautiful words & a beautiful painting.
You are totally correct about yesterday & tomorrow
We need to concentrate on today & what we have. Everything we have is so precious.
Thank you Anon.. i'm happy my recent post inspired by words of another Anon writer moved you enough You to leave your thoughts here agreeing.
We are all precious
We are all needing Support
We are all needing Love
in some form.
These words above were expressed recently in Perugina Art.. my art blog.
When you sent me an invitation to your blog I went to it and studied your words, paintings, photographs, and the quality of the blog itself. Perugina, your blog reveals the heart of a truly classy individual.
Though you never mention the specifics of your current emotional struggles, your omission of the specifics is part of the excellence of the blog.
Anyone of any significant age and experience knows what it means to have their heart and soul ground to powder and blown to the wind.
One need not rationalize the specifics. That part of the story can be fully grasped only through the life-experience the individual. All your friends need to know is that though your former heart may have perished, the physical body did not, so some new heart must grow within the hollow shell. A new you with new dreams is being born.
Your blog graphically shows us the foundation upon which you are rebuilding; your art, your dreams of mastering the violin, and your poetic writings.
Perugina, I wish you the very very best in this effort. I am 53 years old and have survived two tragedies that few would be able to identify with. Not only did I survive, but each new heart was richer and more beautiful than the last. Of course, regenerated beauty cannot be comprehended by all, only by those to whom the gift is given.
Lastly, your blog does not give us any clues as to the day to day substance of your existence. What it shows us is your own concept of yourself, your sense of self-worth, and your vision of the beauty you have to offer the world if it will only stop and look.
You paint yourself as several beautiful women that you know live within you, you photograph yourself as the lover and protector of your instrument, adoring it as you guard it, just as a mother with her child or a God with his creation.
You reveal your sensuality through the flow of lines rather than through the less-dignified over-exposure of your body (as several on RedBubble are prone to do).
As I put down a last word, I want the budding new heart within you to know that one more person in the world was completely captivated by that portion of you that radiates beauty, dignity and a haunting grace.
As you live your through your common days as a regular woman enduring the inevitable realities of being a struggling human being, please know that the Perugina you know lives within you is a powerful and captivating woman.
You have chosen to reveal this magnificent woman to any who will stop, look, read, and think.
Those who have taken the time to do so will not be able to soon forget you.
Grow and develop, Perugina…you are a beautiful child becoming a beautiful woman.
Hold your violin when you cry.
Phil,
Today when everyone is so time poor and caught up in their own life dramas, it can mean much to have words of comfort and support from someone who has taken considerable time and effort to reach out and express all You have here to me.. i consider this truly a kindness… as for me at present it is a time when everything is so dark.
So to You i express my sincere gratitude for this thoughtful and considerate gesture.
Also that you say you have taken some time to read, look at my paintings and photographs which are infused within donna con il violino blu leave me truly touched.
That you recognise solely by what you see from my blog that within me lies a ‘heart of a classy individual’ is such a lovely thing to say.
I read your words many times before i commenced this reply to you, for i would like to respond in the same way as You have - caringly.
No doubt i will read them again and again in hope that they will continue to provide me with strength and faith that there are others out there that do take the time to show their care.. for there are many people that cross your path day in and day out and sometimes i wish to have them look into my eyes and really see me.
Phil may i have your permission to add these very caring thoughts you have written to me, to be embedded into my journey with the violin so as i can read them over and over when i feel the dark envelop me, for they have provided me with light today.
You are so right when you talk about life experiences, for it is a rare person who possesses no scar of hurt, pain & struggle and each of us will carry within us an experience whereby the heart and soul was ‘ground to powder and blown to the wind.’ I am sorry for Yours.
I love how You have expressed that ‘a new heart must grow within the hollow shell and with it a new you with new dreams is being born.’
With those words written, You reminded me that i was reborn in 2007.. and through my art, writing, music.. i am endeavoring to become the person i want to be, even with its limitations, shortcomings, human frailties and flaws coupled with all of the obstacles which life is currently throwing at me for i embrace these also.
Thank you for stopping, looking, reading, thinking and above all writing this..
‘I want the budding new heart within you to know that one more person in the world was completely captivated by that portion of you that radiates beauty, dignity and a haunting grace…’
and
’Those who have taken the time to do so will not be able to soon forget you.’
I am moved.
_______________
I am holding my violin now.
donna con il violino blu
Really like the graphical design and navigation of the site, easy on the eyes and good content. other sites are just way too overflowing with adds.
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